Black room black blackness

I wrote this tonight...inspired by my drive from Omaha to Lincoln tonight...it's possibly the very beginning of a very long short story. I'm not sure if I want to develop it anymore into the idea that I have for it... which involved her taking a cross-country journey through her life and coming to some strange philosophical realizations... hmm... we weill see.

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As she looked around her, she saw nothing. It was as if she were blind, and almost as if she had never known the joy of sight. She felt around in the dark for something — anything at all to clasp onto — but what she felt was just as empty as what she saw. She sat down, hopeless; she wanted to cry. She was overwhelmed by her life’s journey thus far and was almost ready to end it. She didn’t feel like the carefree joyous girl she once was, and that hurt almost more than the fact that she had been hurt by so many other people and events in her life… the fact that she had experienced so much and always been able to keep a hold of herself even in the toughest of times made her hate herself for losing herself during these tough times.

She sat and thought about you, and you, and you, and that death and this death, and this rape, and that abuse, and this mistake and that mistake, this hurt and that hurt and this hurt and that hurt and the list did not seem to end. And just as she was about to completely lose all hope and give up and just lie in that cold, black room for an eternity waiting for something to happen… a thought came to her. And as that thought came to her, she began to see the stars in the sky. Lit one by one like an old set of Christmas lights slowly flickering and every single one eventually finding the energy to light the entire string and brighten the night sky.

And as each one of those stars flickered and new ones slowly came to sight, she noticed the waxing crescent moon in the north sky. She saw the Big Dipper and Orion’s Belt and for the first time in so long; she had an inexplicable feeling — something that tingled every bone of her body telling her to GO. Soon, she realized the ground she was sitting upon was not wooden boards, but a road, and the room she thought she was stuck in was not a room at all, but wide open earth.